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Like the marginal American Christians we are, we and our friends and all our marginally Christian offspring walked house to house in our neighborhood last night, paying tribute to the Prince of Darkness and all his minions. Apparently we'll do anything for candy.

We dressed our kids in tribute to their favorite demons of the underworld: Superman, Spiderman, Cheerleader, Bee, Gorilla, Angel etc. We threatened shut-ins with "tricks" if they didn't treat us. And with our baskets full of gluttony we then posed for pictures with each other before sacrificing a small animal in the middle of the cul-de-sac and calling it a night.

I feel so dirty.


Anonymous Stephen said...

Did your kids get any Chick tracts while you were out sacrificing small animals?

Blogger stephen said...

And what were you hoping to communicate to your readers with this post?

Anonymous Stephen L. said...

For the record, just the first comment is mine (of the two stephen's). I like satire.

Blogger Shaun Groves said...

That I'm a bad bad person for participating in the secular holiday commonly known as Halloween and that I most deeply regret sacrificing the golden retriever that once lived next door. The devil made me do it. It's his holiday you know? There's no resisting him once you eat the first candy bar or pack of Smartees. He incarnates the nougat and sugar I think. I think that's how he does it.

Anyway, the point is that it's a slippery slope you know? Anything related to Halloween, or related to anything related to Halloween, or related to anything that's related to anything that's related to Halloween is pure evil and is to be avoided. I learned my lesson...one golden retriever too late.

Blogger Mustard Packet Pelter said...

That my friend is why I celebrate National Dress Up and Get Free Candy Day which also happens falls on the 31st of October. No doggy sacrifices needed, no worship to any evil thing, only a costume and candy.

Don't feel too bad lots of kids here at TFC (which is an AMAZING CHRISTIAN school) went trick-or-treating last night. Apparently it's a tradition around here to not dress up and just go get candy and or go bag snatching. I'd been dressed up as some Lady of whatever country or story all day (the wig started to get itchy and the dress was HOT as in temperature not...sexual) I was tired and went home watched a few Halloween episodes of MacGyver with one of my friends and chilled out instead of going out.

Blogger Cristy said...

I love seeing all the trick-or-treaters in their costumes. My kids always wanted to stay home so they could dress up and hide in the yard/bushes and scare the trick-or-treaters. One year they did go, though, and came home with one of the Chick tracts...I wasn't real happy. They didn't remember where they got it...and fortunately they were old enough that they just thought it was funny.

Blogger supersimbo said...

shaun!! hehe nice post........did you drink the blood of the small animal ? Nice to see you are safely home again..............good time in Germany?

Blogger Shaun Groves said...

Germany was good...it's no Ireland, but....

Hey, can you send me your brother's e-mail address? Send to shaunfanmail@bellsouth.net. Thanks. (We need to work out that whole live recording thing.)

Blogger GrovesFan said...

We did the "indoor" version of trick or treating last night. At the Christian school. It was nicer considering it was a bout 18 degrees, snowing and WINDY outside. See what you have to look forward to in January in North Dakota? Thank you Brian for booking this winter wonderland tour.


Blogger Brody Harper said...

they all look harmless enough, except for that one in the stroller. that one looks like trouble.

Blogger FzxGkJssFrk said...

Should I be offended? Or did somebody give you a Chick tract?

Blogger Kathryn said...

cute picture!!!! love the tongue in cheek talk. I'm sure the kids had a blast?!!! We had a great bunch of kids come to the house this year. . polite and just really nice. Candy was gone in an hour. . and since our girls are now in their 20s and not living here with us any more *sniff!!*. . we went to see "The Prestige"!! Our grandkids however were adorable as little Princess and big guy Firefighter! We took them treats before they went out with Daddy to get their loot.

Blogger The Cachinnator said...

You evil evil man. I'll pray for you.

Anonymous Stephen L. said...

Cach, do you really think praying for him will do any good at this point? Didn't you see he ate a pack of Smarties?

Blogger FreeThinker said...

Ha! We atheists like to poke fun of ourselves too:

Did you hear about the atheist's funeral?

He was all dressed up with nowhere to go ...


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